Loopkicks camp – The wake up call post #22

Loopkicks camp – The wake up call post#22

July 2004

Camp was an amazing experience. It was such a great learning experience for everyone. Who would have thought a bunch of teenage misfits with no business experience and no organizational skills could pull such an epic event off.

The mini show was successful also. All the guests performed in the afternoon show. There were some very memorable performances. The routine I did with Wild One was ok. Wasn’t as good as I expected it to be. It wasn’t the right crowd I think. The routine was for more a mature audience. But you have to try new things regardless of the outcome. Everything after the show was going to be a breeze. Everyone had a night to do whatever he or she wanted. I needed the mental rest.

Wild One and I had definitely become a lot closer as the days passed. She wasn’t as wild and crazy as she appeared. She and I flirted hardcore for a long time that night. I wasn’t going to give in though. I don’t think she has ever lost this game.

So instead of losing the game. She decided that she would hook up with someone else instead. Which I didn’t mind. The satisfaction of winning was enough for me in this situation. Everyone was having a great time at the guest party house. Time flew by. I really needed to get home and get some sleep. On my way out I ran into Wild One. I told her bye and said I would see her tomorrow.

I asked her if she needed a ride back to the hotel. She said sure. On the drive to the hotel I asked her if she was going to see Shuriken later tonight. She said yes. Then she responded with

“But I would rather have someone else though”

I told her that she was being greedy and a bad girl. She gave me the look that said, “I don’t give a fuck”. I looked at her and said “hell, why not”.

I followed her back to her room. It will be a night I will never forget and not in a good way. She didn’t get the name Wild One for no reason. Here is how it all went down.

Wild One and I did our thing. Afterwards I was exhausted. There was no way I was driving home. I decided to just crash there. Minutes later there is a knock on the door. Wild One is in the bathroom. So I opened the door. It was Shuriken. I was too tired to care who was here. I told him Wild One was in the Bathroom. I went back to the bed that Wild One and I just hooked up on. The room had two queen beds. Shuriken laid on the other bed. I rolled over to go to sleep. I hear Wild One come out of the bathroom. Moments later I hear them making out. I know where this is leading. I fell asleep mid make out. Thankfully.

When I woke up in the morning, Shuriken was gone. I went to the bathroom. When I came out I laid next to Wild One. I have no idea why I didn’t just go home. A little while later. We hooked up again. I felt disgusting. I don’t know why I decided to go at it again with her. But it was definitely a wake up call.

I drove home feeling used and filthy. I did it to myself. I was paying the price though. I was having anxiety attacks. I was a complete mess. When I got home, I just went to my room and laid in my bed in the fetal position. I didn’t contact anyone for a long time. I slowly pulled it together. Enough to turn on my computer. I still didn’t want to interact with anyone.

My computer automatically connected to aim when it starts up. Which I had forgotten in my messed up head situation. Before I could log off of aim. Throwback messaged me. Why did she want to talk to me right now? Of all people, why her? She asked where I was and that everyone was worried about me. I told her that I had a rough night and didn’t want to be around anyone today.

She asked me why. I told her that I didn’t want to talk about it. She told me that she understood and that if I needed someone to talk to, that she would be here to listen.

I really needed someone to talk to. I was making it worse holding it inside. An hour later I told her that I would drive over there and talk to her about my problem. She said that she would be waiting for me.

I drove over to the guesthouse and met up with Throwback. We sat down on the curb far away from the guesthouse and I told her about everything that happened. I told her that I know I did it to myself and I have no one to blame but myself. That’s why I didn’t want to talk to anyone. She was very consoling and had a way to make me feel much better.

I thanked her for talking with me about everything. She asked what I was going to do for the rest of the day. I told her that I would probably just stay home and try to get over it myself. I could tell that she wanted to tell me that, that wasn’t a good way to deal with it. But she told me again that she would be there for me anytime I needed someone to talk to and not be a stranger. I gave her a hug and left.